Disclaimer: I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade, or accuse anyone of anything. I'm just trying to get my feelings out of my head and chronicle baby/pregnancy happenings. Honestly.
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This baby shower thing is REALLY upsetting me. I don't know if I'm going to have one. I don't know who would throw it for me. You're not supposed to throw your own. If I could, without looking bad, I would. Then it wouldn't worry and upset me so much, because I wouldn't have to wonder if I have any friends that are close enough to WANT to have one for me. I wish I was home. I *know* I have friends there, and I know SOMEONE would care enough to offer. I've had an acquaintance or two say "I'll make sure SOMEONE throws you a shower" but am I supposed to bank on that?
Am i SUPPOSED to ask someone to throw me a shower? Someone PLEASE tell me if that's the case, it would take away lot of worry and stress. I feel so stupid. And friendless... I have plenty of "friends" here, I guess, but I don't have a best friend. I miss Charleston SO BADLY right now. We could have a big ol' pig pickin' or rent the deck of a restaurant like Creekside, and it'd be fun and beautiful, overlooking the marsh and water and people would come and celebrate the baby. Nice dream, huh?
I also don't know WHEN it would be. There are two ladies from our boat due to have their babies soon AFTER I am, and one of their showers is going to be in late August or September! They have their reasons, which are perfectly valid, but it makes me feel even more left out. They're already planning it. I don't even know if I'm going to HAVE a shower. It's really hurting my stupid feelings and really upsetting me that they're already planning it (out loud and in front of everybody). It's probably just my hormones going crazy, but I've been crying for almost 45 minutes about it. I guess the only shower I'm having is the kind created by my face. Ha. Ha.
I don't know what to do, or what I can possibly say... Or who I'd say it to. I don't know what to do to fix this so it won't asplode me anymore.
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Aww. Why don't you have a cyber shower?! I just made it up but I think it's a good idea and it probably really exists. Just register like you usually would, and your friends from Charleston and everywhere else can buy you presents and you'll get them in the mail! It's not the same as a face-to-face gathering, but I KNOW people want to celebrate your baby however they can. I'll put it together. You could just make a facebook group or something for your cyber-shower. (Wait, cybershower sounds a little dirty to me. Maybe call it something else...haha.) Or I could make the invitations that I never made for my own shower and mail them out if you don't have like a million people to invite.
ReplyDeleteA friend could make the group if you want so you're not making it yourself. And then add all your friends. Everybody understands why you're away, and that your husband is away, and will want to participate!
So yeah, it's an idea! Maybe a dumb one, but it could be really neat!
Or maybe you could host it on a blog. And as you get the presents you could take pictures for all your baby shower "attendees" to see!
Ok so now I've researched it a little bit. I found this:
http://www.5minutesformom.com/2371/cyber-baby-shower/
and this:
http://ezinearticles.com/?Digital-Delight---The-Cyber-Baby-Shower&id=1371086
They are using a webcam! I don't know if you have one of those but that could be neat.
And here's one more:
http://sassyfrazz.blogspot.com/2008/11/cyber-baby-shower-for-our-blessing-4.html.
So just a thought. All you really need is for another person to be all psyched about it and put it together for you so it doesn't look like you're doing it yourself. (If that bothers you.)
Linzy,
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you feel so alone. I remember that feeling when I was pregnant. My mom gave me a baby shower, but the in-laws lived in Jersey and held one there and then they brought the gifts in a car when they visited. With you being so far away, I think a cyber shower sounds like a good idea. It would be hard to even have one here and then you'd have to get the gifts back to Hawaii at great expense. I think people should send gifts directly to you.
But the fun of the shower is being with people, having cake and goodies and all that. If we see you here, I'll be glad to have all your friends here for the festivities. Maybe they could bring gift cards or small things you could take back. We can pull it together quickly--games and all. The deck or anywhere outdoors is toooooo Hot and humid. Indoors, AC, only way.
Remember, you're my only girl--the closest I have to a daughter. I'm always here for you. Just let me know what you need. I'm sure your inlaws will have something for you in TX as well.
In the end, there will be lots of gifts, but hopefully there will be a party for your too. And a cake all frosted in pink! And pink balloons and pink ribbons. :> )
Know that we are all as confused about the best way to handle this as well, since none of us have had to deal with this distance before.
Listen, maybe you need to just go ahead and use some of grandma's leftover money and fly here. You and baby deserve it. Do it for both of you. Don't worry about the cost--in the end it's only money and it's there to make you happy. How many times will you have a first baby? This is your life now--spend the money and enjoy your life. You can borrow my car too, while you're here. I don't use it much anyway.
Love you.
Aww, thanks you guys!! I really appreciate the comments and suggestions. They almost make me feel like I've been hugged. :]
ReplyDeleteI'm still waiting to hear from doctors about when/if I can fly home, but I will be updating and deciding on a course of action as soon as I know more!
Thanks again, Amanda and Nadine. You're both very sweet. I feel better now, even if not resolved. :]
I am so sorry that you are going through this alone. I am glad that you have made this blog so you can get your feelings out there. Nadine always has good advice! Make sure that Brandi gets an invitation to whatever you decide to do. We have some things we are going to send you (even your birthday card!) soon. Love, Ric
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